The abandoned prayer lost in the shadows of silence,
Engulfed in the fire of a mind,
Few sacred words that none else shall hear,
Drowned in the sea of a conscience,
If these words should surface amongst the sand,
Washed by the waves of change,
Then treat them well and keep them safe,
Because you’ll never hear them again.
So my mum has been seeing my stepdad for around 8 years now and it’s only in recent years I’ve realised exactly how much of a complete arsehole he is. He’s one of those people who EXPECTS you to do a job because he’s an adult and apparently that merits some kind of award and makes everyone under 18 his personal litter box to shit on.
He just demands respect from people not actually realising that respect doesn’t work that way, that’s not respect; it’s fear, the exact opposite. He’ll go on about how I can do half a job (but all of what he’s told me to do) and yet won’t even thank me for doing it. He’ll go on about “if I was in the real world” or “in a real job”, yeah well if I was in a real job I’d be getting paid and wouldn’t just be expected to do a job for someone I don’t even work for.
Today’s problem is my room, apparently. Because somehow it’s the bane of his existence if a room in a house he doesn’t even live in, isn’t up to his unrealistic minimalist standards.
The only reason I can think of that’d make him want me to clean my room is so his 2 braincells don’t get distracted when he barges in to tell me to do more jobs he won’t appreciate or thank me for.
This rant was brought to you by my tendency to express anger creatively rather than keeping it inside me.
Hope you’re all having wonderful days.
It’s currently 23:25, I’ve just eaten a cheese and mustard sandwich and I’ve got a cup of green tea so strong it could most likely corrode metal and forge gold rings imbued with the detoxing powers of all the tea you can get for £3.89. I really don’t want to drink this. It’s just sitting there with it’s putrid green, leafy eyes, begging to venture down my throat and cleanse me with it’s magical power, which I am very disrespectfully, giving a miss.
By my own morals and best attempt at self caring – I should not be this awake this late. I just want to make more music and draw but my bed is yearning for me, like the warm comforting hand of sleep rocking me in a relaxing 6/8 rhythm.
I think my ADHD is getting the better of me, today I’ve gone from making metal on one software to House in the other, I’ve removed the NY from a snapback for being too mainstream, gone to buy Monster, played on my xbox for like 20 minutes and watched Peep Show. Admittedly this information is all as you say, bollocks, but I felt like posting something, so Merry Early Christmas.
~James x
I think my stress levels are going down, possibly. But at the same time I think I’m one small crisis away from becoming a Hollywood-style angry teen who deals with his problems by using the art of interpretative dance.
Someone should definitely turn this into a movie, or perhaps a book. I could have Elijah Wood play me and have Nicolas Cage as the main antagonist. Michael Bae could produce it too, maybe.
Now that I think about it… a book would be better.
My unintelligent friend Corran put this idea into my head in one of his headstrong attempts at being wise and moderately funny. But lately it has become a rather touching subject over the dinner table. Accompanied by my parents forever disappointed faces glaring at me like those floodlights you have on football pitches. I don’t even see why, it’s not as though people even play football on those bloody things in the first place. It’s just full of drug addicted hooligans and sweet wrappers. Apart from all of this, it seems that I’ve been making more music as of lately, so that’s pretty nice. I’m currently working on my second instalment of my cliché, generic pop punk project thing. I could be the Rick Astley of punk.
I’m not sure if that’s a good thing…
Even so, good ole Dick Spatsley was very successful and his new album wasn’t terrible, so I guess those are two good things about him. I’m debating calling this guy I don’t like at college Rick Astley, because that dude is never gonna give up making my life a misery.
Let’s call this guy Gerald.
Gerald enjoys making my life hell by constantly making comments about me to people on my course with no good reason, despite the fact I have genuinely disturbing things I’ve been told about him, those are my Nuclear Launch Codes so to speak, I heard a particularly Juicy rumour about him, another guy and feet. I think that’s all I can stomach of that conversation for now.
I guess the moral of the story is always “If you’re not dead there’s no point questioning the world around you because there will always be someone who’ll want to make your life a living hell”.
With the EU referendum coming up on the 23rd of June, the stakes seem to be getting higher, and the tension continues to rise, so it’s nice to know some people are able to take this lightly.
One of the school staff and his band wrote this, would you guys check it out for me?
And share around if possible,
Have a great day!
~James
So recently Kate McCann has been in the news more, because of one of my favourite celebrities wives, Sharon Osbourne, branded the parents of Madeleine McCann “insane” for leaving their child home alone while they were out of the hotel, whilst abroad. In 2011 Kate McCann was listed alongside JK Rowling and others in a top 20 list of inspirational women, for not ever giving up on finding her Daughter, 8 years ago who went missing on a family holiday in Portugal through her own personal error.
A family friend said: “It’s very disappointing when someone with such a high profile makes this sort of ignorant, ill-informed comment.
Ill formed comment. Sharon, as per usual, was giving honest to god opinions, from a mothers point of view, she wouldn’t leave Kelly alone would she?*
*In all fairness, I wouldn’t leave Kelly Obsourne alone, have you SEEN HER HAIR? Like damn girl.
“Kate and Gerry have never forgiven themselves and this should not have been aired in a random way, as it apparently was.
“It’s based on ignorance of the true facts. While she’s entitled to her view she should keep it to herself.”
But – but, the true facts WERE that mothers (or fathers, let’s not be sexist here) wouldn’t in the right mind leave a child on their own! It’s neglectful and immoral!
So people go missing every day right? Yes, they do, and in our own country they get found, or not, for the not-so-lucky parents.
Not Kate McCann.
To this day, over ELEVEN, MILLION POUNDS, has been spent towards finding this girl.
Eleven. Million. Pounds.
Eleven Million Pounds that could have helped our NHS NOT be on the brink of collapse.
Eleven Million Pounds that could have gone to children’s hospitals and could have literally saved THOUSANDS of lives in the place of this ONE.
Eleven Million Pounds that could have funded research into cancer treatment.
The list goes on.
And yet this £11,000,000 pounds has gone towards a mother who just can’t face the facts.
For those of you who didn’t know, Madeline was left in a hotel at 20:30 while her parents went to a restaurant and left their own children unattended in their hotel room 50 meters away.
“There is no legal age limit for leaving a child on their own, but it is an offence toleave a child alone if it places them at risk. Parents can be prosecuted if they leavea child unsupervised ‘in a manner likely to cause unnecessary suffering or injury to health’ (Children and Young Person’s Act).”
~NiDirect
That is the law on leaving a child on their own. clearly the risk here was that they were
If you do leave your child home alone, remember to do the following:
- leave a contact phone number and make sure you can answer it right away
- leave a separate contact list of people you trust, in case they can’t get hold of you
- talk to your child before you leave about how to stay safe, and tell them not to answer the door to strangers
- make sure dangerous objects like matches and knives are out of reach, as well as medicines and dangerous chemicals
- leave clear instructions on what to do in case of an emergency (like a fire)
- tell them what time you will be back, and don’t be late
- set some basic rules about what they can and can’t do while you are out
- teach them basic first aid
Madeline was too young to do ANY of these things, they ways Kate McCann acts, it seems to me that if Madeline had died in the hotel, (and not anywhere else) then she would have probably gone to the papers anyway suing the hotel, the manager and staff, because it just all clearly comes down to MONEY.
She’s clearly getting a cut of that 11M the government have spent, and from the papers.
Every now and then the family go to the papers and reveal a conspiratorial sighting of who might have her. But that’s it, then it goes to the papers and they get more and more attention, it’s absolutely ludicrous.
If I left my metaphorical kids in a hotel and went swanning off for a meal, and anything happened to them, I’d be arrested and be held guilty of whatever happened to them! but apparently Kate McCann get’s praised as an influential woman for being a terrible parent, and a complete waste tax payers money!
Also, they were out, only FIFTY METERS AWAY, going for a meal, now I don’t know about you, but that seems fishy, (pun not intended). Who takes over an hour and a half to have a meal? The longest I’ve been out was one hour, and that was a 10 minute drive there and back, so 40 minutes, and I was having Indian with the family for Christ’s sake, and that takes ages with all the weird little starter things, and at least 10 minutes of me trying to flirt with waitresses in Punjabi.
Quick story, with having autism I love stuffed animals, and I had this leopard as a kid, (being the animal-naming virtuoso that I am, I named him Leopard). I carried it everywhere until I was like 10, it kept me calm, and happy, and one day, I left him in the IT room at school at home time, went next door to the adjacent classroom, and he was gone upon my return, I was there a whole hour after school, and he didn’t turn up. After leaving the room for 2 seconds. Bearing in mind this was my release and what kept me happy and I was already having bereavement counselling after the death of my dad, I was absolutely destroyed, I cried for weeks, and it didn’t stop. This is how autistic minds can work, I was very very young mentally when I was younger, then I got mentally older faster, and now I look and act older too, don’t ask me how that works because I have no idea.
But the point is, I accepted it, it took a very long time, but it worked, and I now have a photo of him to remember what appeared to be one of my only childhood friends if you will, and he’s still in my heart as much as ever, for being my release from bullying and stress.
Needless to say, I think that this has been dragged out far too long, a couple years, maybe three, is enough. I think it’s time (nine years, a month and one day later) to face the facts, all these sightings, in different places, Madeleine isn’t coming back and that’s a hard truth, but it needs to be accepted.
But let me know what you think! comment below voicing your opinions and tell me what your take on the whole situation is! This is more serious for me, but hey nothing beats controversy at 10 o’clock at night.
Peace and love,
~James
So someone in the comments Asked for 10 facts about me, just to give you an insight on how strange I really am, so here goes nothing :3 Thanks to Tayla P. for requesting this!
So that’s it for this one! anything you wanna know? any questions? let me know in the comments below!
Have a fab day!
~James
Little Broken Pencil 